Like us, lots of people want to move abroad. They dream of a new life filled with sidewalk cafés, rainforest ecotours, or midnight street food.

To help you find a place to live, prominent organizations use data to sort and rank destinations and announce those findings in the media. They create superlatives like the happiest country (Finland) or the most livable city (Vienna).

Even if a country is ranked tops on some list or other, it doesn’t mean you will love it yourself. Heres what some expats said when asked for stories of moving to the most perfect, happiest country, but hating it.

Denmark is Boring

“Lack of opportunities, very hard to integrate, boring (sorry)…it’s just not for us 🤷‍♀️”

“Denmark is heaven if you’re willing to sacrifice a lot of ‘soft’ benefits. Like a sense of community and reliable friendships. It does work for a few Americans and Canadians I know, but this country is agreeable to their personalities. Despite the work-related benefits and the relative safety, I find myself flat and spread thin without zest for life the longer I stay. I’m sure it works for a lot of people.”

Sweden is Conforming

“In Sweden, the social pressure to conform in absolutely every aspect of life is soul crushing. The culture is very difficult to integrate into, and I’m not even sure it’s possible. I am certain, however, that I no longer want to try.”

“Golden cage sums it up well, same in Sweden. It’s like somehow a good easy life but you feel there is no real pulse to it and you’re just comfortably numb”

Iceland Needs Infrastructure

“Iceland could do with a bit more infrastructure that Sweden and Denmark have though, speaking as a resident of Iceland who has also lived in Sweden.”

“I was a resident of Iceland for 3 years and just couldn’t make a sustainable life in a place with like 3 big industries. It’s a shame, cuz otherwise I would have stayed.”

Finland Isn’t Always Happy

“I always thought it was weird that Finland is always at or near the top of the rankings for quality of living and ‘happiness’ yet it has relatively high rates of suicide and alcoholism. Lack of sunlight must really have an effect.”

The Netherlands Isn’t Spontaneous

“Impossible to make new (Dutch) friends, nothing is spontaneous get you agenda ready for coffee in 2 months, the weather, crowded

“But it’s a hit and miss. I know expats who absolutely love it there and I know who absolutely hate it”

New Zealand is Provincial

“I love, respect and seek to become a citizen of New Zealand yet I also sometimes feel a lot like Belle in Beauty and the Beast singing angrily about living a provincial life.

“It’s not them, it’s me.”

“Lol even my mom who visited for about a week said the country was boring except for the nature.”

Ireland is in Tatters

“Ireland, absolutely lovely people there but housing and public transport is in tatters literally everywhere. Moved over to England, although not perfect in anyway but miles better public services and housing situation.”

“I’m Irish and can completely testify to this. Housing is overpriced and public transport outside of Dublin (sometimes even within) is lackluster or non existent.”

Switzerland is Inconvenient

“I just don’t find trains on time, clean and tidy, or peaceful important factors. Dating is horrendous, the food the worst in Europe, and the life style is boring if you are young. Everything closes early and there is no convenience. It’s basically go to work, then home and wait for the next day to begin, so you can work again – and after one month, you can save some money and look at your spreadsheet and count how many more months/years you need to live here before you can leave.”

“Same, I moved there for work with a two-year contract and an option to stay permanently. I went with so much excitement and good intentions, but by the end of the first day I had a lot of doubts and by the end of the first month I knew I would leave as soon as my contract was up. I made some good money, but I don’t love money enough to live that life.”

Singapore is Too Small

“Everything work well, transit is fantastic and affordable, government services are smooth and easy to use. Food is cheap and plentiful. Government is stable and predictable.

“But man is it boring. You really start to feel the size of it after a while, it’s like living in a US city but never leaving city limits. And because of the weather it’s indoors most of the days and your options are a ton of different malls or super expensive and crowded indoor “fun things”. It takes about 2 weeks to see the entire country.

“After that it’s exactly as you put it. Work, come home, work. End of the month remind yourself you’re making good money.

“The cheap local travel to other countries is nice, but it doesn’t take long to visit most countries within a few hours flight.”

“Agreed. truly cannot wait to leave next year once my contract is up. it’s an incredibly soulless city with a lack of variety in lifestyle. I honestly feel as if Singapore is just one big corporation masquerading as a country.”

Germany is Racist

“When I was younger I was convinced Germany would be perfect. It ended up being a very traumatizing experience. The downsides were very surprising to me. Lots of overt racism, sexism, etc. Very difficult to make friends.”

“The racism is so bad, I’m visiting Germany right now as a brown guy and someone literally spit on me a few days ago. I was in shock.”

Norway is Passive-Aggressive

“It’s so hard to find friends that are not also foreigners. And the healthcare system is rubbish compared to other Scandinavian countries. Lastly the cultural avoidance of conflict makes it so difficult to have an honest discussion about something that might be briefly unpleasant. I’ve experienced this with handymen, daycare, work places… it’s so strange. Like a common agreement among Norwegians to be passive aggressive and avoid confrontation”

“Norway. On paper it’s the perfect country, but the people are lazy, group-minded, racist, self-entitled and generally ignorant about the rest of the world.

“Living here sucks, a combination of high taxes, high cost of living, extreme weather, and that Norwegians have an extremely bad relationship to alcohol and partying.”

South Korea is Toxic

“The most 50/50 country I’ve lived in is Korea. I really liked the Koreans, because they were nice and welcoming, even though I totally felt like a foreigner 100% of the time. Going out with colleagues was almost always fun. It’s also a beautiful country (albeit the grey concrete buildings everywhere) and the food can be nice.

“But the Korean society is one of the most toxic I’ve experienced. The constant competition and inequalities became really depressing after a while. I really hated seeing kids pushed to win from youngest age and thinking that most of them would just fail. Also, it’s a very sexist society. What pushed me to leave was the birth of my daughter. I just didn’t see her growing up in such a messed-up society.”

Canada is Cold (in Multiple Ways)

“I’m a Canadian citizen and did all of my high school education there. It’s a stunning place to live with regard to the forests and lakes, but the winter, rampant mental illness, and starchiness of the culture was not for me. Maybe things are different now with so many second generation immigrants being more active members of society but I still can’t handle the cold.”

“Canadian social culture is unbearable. People are not warm beneath the surface.”

Japan Has Too Much Social Pressure

“In the Anglosphere, we’ve got phrases like “tall poppy syndrome” and “crabs in a bucket”, and I found out from this thread about the Law of Jante which I’d never heard of before.

“Short of writing an essay, Japan is those phrases/unspoken social codes on ‘roids. The social rules and cues are so utterly draconian, and what’s more, the demands of said rules/virtues set people up to be in a permanent state of anxiety about whether they’re picking up on these cues and responding correctly to them. Really is it any wonder Japan’s got such severe mental health issues?”

Belgium is Dystopian

“I lived in Belgium for 2 years. Worst experience of my life. Brussels is… interesting, seeing the most elite wealthy in the EU bubble and seeing homeless people shoot up drugs or go through withdrawals 400m away is so dystopian. The state of the city also took a huge toll on my [mental health] because I’m a big empath. I thought Belgium was one of the richest countries in the world but the infrastructure and city planning left a lot to be desired and made living in the city difficult especially the traffic. I found Flemish people cold and xenophobic/racist.”

Australia is Insufferable

“Australia, I even became a citizen. On paper, it’s the perfect county. But I found the people insufferable, insular and racist. Sydney and Melbourne can experience a lot of heat and bushfires which makes living in the city very uncomfortable. The county is pretty but becomes very boring quickly, and it’s a nanny state.”

“Insular, backward, racist, sexist horrible place. Loved the over 200 day lockdown and 2 year ban on leaving the country.

“Superficially friendly but rude and mean underneath to anyone who isn’t a white Australian born there.

“Going through Immigration when I left, the jerk told me to get on the plane and don’t come back.”

Czech Language is Too Difficult

“Czech Republic! I’ve been here for 5 years and already planning on returning to my poor home country :D

“Language is too difficult to learn, but even if you learn the basics after years it its hard to understand other people talking or pronounce correctly, and people here just refuse to speak english. Even if they can speak, usually dont bother. Also not easy at all to make friendships.

“Weather is horrible, winter is so cold with months and months of darkness (no sun the previous year for months in a row) with no much snow, especially last years, so very boring.

“Not my cup of tea, only thing keeping me here is the salary—multinational company— but I’m very miserable here. I prefer having low salary and be happy than this “life” I do the last years.

“I don’t hate the country, it is generally beautiful, has very good transportation, is organized, etc., but I’m not fit to live here. Maybe, if I was from Slovakia or around here would have no issues, or at least not that many :D as they are more similar.”

Texas is Terrible

“I think far too many people generalize the USA, so I’m going to be specific: I dislike living in Texas.

“The weather is awful. The electric grid is a joke. One of our Senators happens to be one of the most despised people in our country, but the state keeps voting for him. Speaking of politics, our state government does not really reflect the majority of the people in the state.

“A lot of people that live here will be so nice to your face, and then be so mean and petty the moment you turn around. Our education system is a joke because state officials are intentionally trying to make it suck so they can point to how awesome private school is.

“It’s expensive to live here. Many areas are really dangerous. Our road network is insane and boasts some of the highest speed limits in the country. We are among the largest states in the country, but we refuse to fund high speed rail that would greatly increase people’s ability to travel between the major population centers quickly and easily.

“We have so many natural disaster risks: the north is in Tornado Alley, the southeast has hurricanes, and the entire state is at risk for wildfires. The only things we don’t have consistently are earthquakes and blizzards (the latter of which has actually begun to be a problem).

“At one point, Texas was one of the most sought after states to move to in America, which as a country is one of the most highly sought after in the world. That would make you think Texas should be near-paradise, but it really kinda sucks. I’m very glad that I was able to get out.”

So Where Should You Go?

Just because these folks don’t like where they landed doesn’t mean that you won’t. One user sums it up:

“I think it’s more about perspective and expectations. If you focus on the bad things in the country then it can overshadow the good. I really don’t believe in a perfect country, there is no such thing as paradise.

“A lot of people already have an expectation in their head about certain countries so when they move and those expectations are not met, they get very disappointed and blame it on the country itself.

“There will always be things that you will not be satisfied about. Of course so and so is better in your home but what about this other so and so that you used to complain about back home that you now get to enjoy in your new country?”

Another point to remember is that there’s no perfect country, just the right country for you.

5 Easy Ways to Find the Best Country to Live In

How do you find the best country to live in?

With nearly 200 countries to choose from, picking your top countries gets tough quickly. Here are a few ways to find the lifestyle that suits your needs:

➤ 5 Easy Ways to Find the Best Country to Live In

How to Leave America: 6 Steps to Your New Life

Are you thinking about leaving the United States? You’re not alone; as many as 15% percent of Americans say they want to leave the country permanently.

➤ How to Leave America: 6 Steps to Your New Life

11 Reasons Women Are Fleeing the USA

While the number of people emigrating from the United States grows, there’s one thing the news isn’t reporting: many of these people are women.

The number of solo woman expats is soaring, while married women work to convince reticent husbands to move abroad. Here are some of the reasons women are fleeing the USA:

➤ 11 Reasons Women Are Fleeing the USA